Take The Limits Off

I got so tickled today!! On my road to finding out exactly WHO I am, I've learned that first, we MUST be honest with ourselves! For so long, I've stood under the shadows of others. I did what they did. I agreed with what they said. I was like a puppet. I didn't even know who HOPE was! Well, on my road to 'deliverance' (smile) I've decided to just be HONEST! God knows and discerns our hearts! He knows us better than we know ourselves but we can not expect to be delivered if we are not willing to be honest with ourselves! I think the worse possible thing we could do is to lie to ourselves about ANYTHING!!
Now, I attend an event on a semi-regular basis. It's 'tradition'. (no, not church) I remembered thinking "I'm tired, but I'm going to press to go. Why? Because......hmmmmmm......" At first, I was completely blank! I began to try to pull all these reasons out of the sky and I KNEW I was lying to myself. I was 'faking the funk' right there all by myself to myself! I realized what a mess I was making and I began to laugh. I'm laughing now! I had an 'aha!' moment! I realized that there was no one in my head but Me and God, so why lie? What good was that going to do me? I repented and I told the Lord, "OK. I don't enjoy this event. I don't get anything out of it. I'm not focused. I sit there and try to glance at other people's watches so that It won't be obvious that I'm glancing at my own because I am so ready to leave....I JUST DON'T WANT TO GO!!! HELP! "At that moment, I was free! WHEW! God already knows and whether what we are feeling is a good emotion or a bad one, wrong or right, He is there to help!! He wants that vital relationship with us where we trust Him with everything! If it was something that was vital and I just HAD to be there, He would have taken that negative emotion and given me the strength I needed to press on. Because I was honest and real, I would have pressed on in His strength and not my own and there would have been a special blessing waiting. Now, if I was not obligated to go or if there really was some issues there where I needed to make some changes, He would have guided me in that area as well. The point is, I'm learning to be honest with myself and with God. It's a liberating feeling!! TRY IT!! In the end, my daughter was not feeling well so I didn't go but still the lesson was learned. "TO THINE OWN SELF BE TRUE!" I don't know who said that but I bet they had an "aha!" moment as well. Be Blessed!!!